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Today's Fortune: |
   
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Saturday, February 02, 2002
I've embarked on a new career.
An old friend of mine who is also unemployed and not averse to physical labor decided to go into the salvage business. We started Wednesday, attending a series of auctions for abandoned and unpaid Public Storage units. The day was well picked, it was a weekday, 45, and drizzling.
The way these auctions worked was the district manager went from location to location with a list of units that were to be sold. Everyone would sign in at each location, then go to each of the various units to be sold; where the door would be opened, and everyone would file past the opening peering in to see what of value there was inside.
No entering the unit, and no touching. This policy appears to be specific to Public Storage, to prevent theft or fraud. The district manager would then take bids in five dollar increments, or if there were no bidders, would ask for a zero bid, someone who would empty the unit in exchange for whatever they might find. State law said that all zero bids had to be competitive, that there had to be at least 3 bidders present.
Every location had between 1 and 10 units for auction, and payment was due at that location immediately. I found that beds, couches, washers and dryers were the treasure most bidders sought, and the more extraneous items in the unit, the lower the going price.
A single unit with matching pleather couch and loveseat and late model washer and dryer went for $400. Most hotly bid units went for around $200, and had fairly new beds or couches. Then came the moving units, which had some large items of value, like beds, but also had boxes and miscellany. These were less popular because the entire unit has to be emptied, and while the bed might be valuable, the boxes would mean several trips and lots of dumpster space.
Also in this category were the units filled with amenities from some type of business, usually an office, with cube walls, desks, lamps and filing cabinets, as well as large quantities of paper; or the restaurant, replete with coolers, utensils, tables, shelving, etc.. Again, these units had a lot of things of value, but would require a lot of work to clear. And finally there were the junk units, full of boxes of unidentifiable things, particleboard furniture, and low value items like bikes and desks.
Having no need for or ability to estimate the value of household furniture like beds and couches, I targetted the larger units, which would be high labor, but cheap. I ended up with a unit that had been occupied by a restauranteur and and air conditioner collector. It should have been a sign when the other two people who were going for large commercial items stopped bidding at $70 when there was within reach of the door a stainless restaurant sink worth $150 at any used restaurant equipment shop. I got the unit for $75 plus tax, and soon realized that even though I could only see 12 feet into the unit, it was 25 feet deep.
5 large trailer-loads of stuff later, I am the proud owner of 43 window unit air conditioners, all 220v so as to limit their resale value, and all but three missing the outer shroud which covers the unit, and by which the unit mounts to the window. I have 2 large household refrigerators, a commercial stainless freezer, and a 64 inch wide 8 foot tall commercial refrigerator, all working but low on freon.
Not one but two stainless sinks, two household stoves, an unused dishwasher, two chainsaws, 6 lawnmower motors, boxes of tools, boxes of restaurant cleaner, a condensor unit for a 1000-1200 sq ft walkin freezer, conservatively estimated at $1500 resale value if it works and if someone wants to buy it. I can't test it though, because it's 3 phase, and rated at 183 amps; neither of which my house electrical supply are capable of. Oh, and it weighs 400 lbs.
Two VCRs, broken. One TV untested. Four bread racks, wire baskets for said racks. Two glass tabletops. Four small (four person) restaurant tables, three unused toilets, a treadmill, a stairstepper, and some other exercise device that I don't know how to describe.
I don't even know where to begin with on working, coverless air conditioners; so I'm borrowing a freon vacuum pump next week and draining them, then cutting them up into scrap. Using couple that didn't have freon in them to estimate, I think there will be about $5 in copper and aluminum per unit, and and a few cents in scrap metal. Hopefully the freon will work in the refrigerators, so that I'll have ~$700 in refrigeration equipment.
Stoves look to be going for about $100 in the denton paper, or at least being advertised for $100, but I have yet to test mine to see if they work. The paper also has a deal to advertise items for less than $300 for free, but some restrictions apply, and I have a feeling that trying to sell 30 items at once would violate those restrictions.
Unit number two was a junk unit, but included a record collection and a tape collection. 150 records and 300 tapes later (Recycled only took one record and 30 or so tapes for $48), I'm $17 dollars down and am fighting the very strong urge to burn them.
After looking around to get rid of what I have, I see a few bids I really shouldn't have let go (like the almost new large capacity whirlpool washer dryer set for $25), and I know to avoid vinyl like the plague.
Best of all, whenever someone asks me what I do, I no longer say 'not currently employed', I say 'capitalist'.
.: posted by Grand Inquisitor Fnord Moco 2/2/2002
Wednesday, January 30, 2002
The SEC, FTC and somebody else want to protect stupid people from online investment scams. I remember a company that said it had a product that was like a huge magnetic patch for leaking supertankers. I thought it was completely fake, but Andy thought it was for real, or at least a good idea, I don't remember.
.: posted by Jeremy 1/30/2002
Tuesday, January 29, 2002
Today I got pulled over in my Cushman. I was going too fast. I gave the cop my Texas Driver's License, but it took them so long to get any info on me that he finally just gave me back my license and told me to slow it down.
That's not as easy as it sounds, though. There are two rules to driving the Cushman:
1. Once you start it up, don't stop until you get where you're going.
2. Try not to slow down on the way.
After a while you learn to accelerate up to 40, then coast the rest of the way. I usually skid when I pull into the shop (partly due to one of the complaints below) Almost everytime I take my foot off the gas pedal, the Cushman stalls. This is especially tricky, since, unlike the Cushman linked to above, mine has a standard transmission. I shift gears very quickly. Other complaints about my Cushman:
I guess there are some things I like about it, though. It's got an extremely tight turning radius, and it goes surprisingly fast for a glorified tricycle. The fastest I've ever driven it is 50, but that's only for lack of a straightaway. And I can drive it on the sidewalks. Best of all, its extremely limited cargo capacity pretty much keeps me from getting involved in any big projects.
.: posted by andy 1/29/2002
Ran across this and wish to state categorically that it all a bunch of crap, with no....Sorry, I had to go get a quick sandwich. Now, as I was saying. Damn, I forgot my point. I have to go to the store and get some Doritos. Back later.
.: posted by George 1/29/2002
Monday, January 28, 2002
"The most famous picture of the female statue came in the 1980s, when Attorney General Edwin Meese released the final report of his commission on pornography."
Now that's funny.
.: posted by Jeremy 1/28/2002
I wonder what those sneaky Japanese have been up to...
.: posted by Jeremy 1/28/2002
Maybe she has dual citizenship. Those europeans cross-breed a lot. Just look at switzerland. 5 official languages.
.: posted by Jeremy 1/28/2002
I don't understand how an Italian porn star who's been elected to public office in Italy can run for parliament in Hungary.
I finally bought an RF modulator tonight, a $30 box that lets me hook up my $80 DVD player to my $70 TV. Now I can watch all the DVD's I've been buying for the past few months. The best thing about DVDs is the alternate audio and subtitles. Some things don't come through well in the translation though. For example, in Full Metal Jacket, 'Who's the slimy little twinkletoed communist cocksucker...' comes out as roughly 'Who's the piece of communist shit' in Spanish and 'Who's the disease infested red' in French. 'I will PT you all until your assholes are sucking buttermilk' came through almost unscathed though, with only minor substitutions of ass for asshole and milk for buttermilk. I also found out that my TV and DVD remotes do not like each other. Changing DVD scenes changes the TV channel and increasing the DVD volume turns on and off the TV.
In unrelated news, I've been taking prednisone for bronchitis for the past few days, and that stuff is amazing. It's a histimine suppressor and a synthetic adrenal steroid, which means that my lungs don't swell shut, and it also means that I'm wired for 18 hours after I take it. The day I got my prescription, I made the mistake of taking it at about 9 PM. I didn't get to sleep until after 3, and woke up at 8 completely alert and twitchy. Yesterday I took it at about 9 AM, and was hyper until 4 AM. A year ago, when I was working all nighters, I'd take double doses of minithins every four hours and still fall asleep. My dose is supposedly a moderate one, 60 mg a day. I think I'd explode if I was on 100+ mg a day. Prednisone interferes with the body's production of it's natural equivilent, and today was my last dose, so tomorrow is going to suck.
.: posted by Grand Inquisitor Fnord Moco 1/28/2002
Sunday, January 27, 2002
The only thing I found silly about this article was this quote: "Her candidacy is nonsense. She's not fit to be a politician."
.: posted by Jeremy 1/27/2002
For your viewing pleasure, The World's Funniest Jokes (seems like one of these rings a bell).
.: posted by George 1/27/2002
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